The Neighbors – Things Just Got Real

S01xE03 – Jackie wants to gossip with Debbie you know like girls do. And after hearing the gossip that Dennis Rodman at the weekly nuclear safety meeting, told Jackie that Venus Williams caught Mike Tyson feeding Maria Sharapova’s alpaca tulips from Kareem Abdul-Jabbar’s garden, Debbie is unsure of how to react. Oh my! The Weavers are getting along fine with the Zabvronians, but are longing to converse with humans, so they invite their friends over to see their house, and gently un-invite the Bird-Kersee’s. Why  gently you ask? Because of Larry being their leader, all of the Zabvronians feel his emotions with him. It’s weird. Unfortunately Jackie and Larry think they’re actually telling them to come over. Debbie is looking forward to a girls night out and Marty is going to play poker with his buddies.

Reggie thinks Marty is a god, and desires to follow in his ways, but his father Larry is keen to show Reggie how things are done because Larry is the man of the house. Yeah that doesn’t go so well. So as Larry and Jackie prepare to crash the party, Reggie shows Jackie a show on his phone so she can learn how to act more human. The show happens to be The Real Housewives of New Jersey. Uh oh.

Larry and Jackie show up at the Weaver’s house ready for fun, but the Weavers aren’t ready for that kind of fun. Jackie is dressed like a Jersey ho, and has adopted the accent as well. Larry decided that felt fabric means you’re supposed to feel it…with your face. Poor Reggie is ashamed again. At dinner with the girls, Jackie sparks a fight by making up some drama, and boy does it work. Larry is playing poker and lays down three wizards and two princesses. He wins the hand. Reggie is again embarrassed by his father and tells him they’re goblins and mamas. Not quite, but nice try.

Back at dinner Debbie has to lay it out for Jackie, because she’s caused such a ruckus. Debbie and Marty like the Bird-Kersee’s, but they get tired of having to explain everything to them. Jackie understands because she and Larry get tired of having to dumb everything down for the Weavers. Oh good everyone is on the same page now. Reggie freaks out about Larry’s incompetence for the human culture, so Larry goes to talk with Reggie about it. They both learn that night that the cards are actually kings and queens, and Larry stole one of the Weaver’s seven tv’s. The blue screen no signal channel is the best.

Best of the episode: Watching the Bird-Kersee’s try to fit in with the humans. They really do want to learn from them, they’re just going about it the wrong way.

Worst of the episode: We didn’t get to see any of Dick Butkus this week. The kid fits his role so well, I actually enjoy watching him.

Where this episode leaves us: Believing that Reggie will have more respect for his father. And hoping that Jackie won’t rely on reality tv for style tips again.

Best one-liner: Debbie – “I’m the best version of myself when I drink Sangria.”

What this episode ruined for us: Reality tv, not that it was hard to do.


– a la Chryshele


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